ask and receive
the truth settles icily through her
chilling the blood heat
that has taken her this far
she realizes the words and images
lines pulled from soul and gut
none of it accounts for
what has been lost
she fills the moments of her days
with pointless desire;
the to-do-list of her life
hints at fear born of
inaction
or lazed stupidity
her glances are covered with
sarcastic indifference
punches she throws never land
where she aims
when she’s alone
trapped with her nightmare thoughts
she reaches for the beads,
defeated,
closes her eyes
and prays
something, after all, must help her
carry the sadness that pulls her under
what she’s not seeing
she’s stopped looking for
solace once sought
in the drink, the song,
the stars, the page,
or the fuck
this solace abandons her
for the last time
too much to understand
this epiphany arrives daily,
but the din drowns it out
the morning alarm sounds
she hits snooze and rolls over,
dreaming of grace
chilling the blood heat
that has taken her this far
she realizes the words and images
lines pulled from soul and gut
none of it accounts for
what has been lost
she fills the moments of her days
with pointless desire;
the to-do-list of her life
hints at fear born of
inaction
or lazed stupidity
her glances are covered with
sarcastic indifference
punches she throws never land
where she aims
when she’s alone
trapped with her nightmare thoughts
she reaches for the beads,
defeated,
closes her eyes
and prays
something, after all, must help her
carry the sadness that pulls her under
what she’s not seeing
she’s stopped looking for
solace once sought
in the drink, the song,
the stars, the page,
or the fuck
this solace abandons her
for the last time
too much to understand
this epiphany arrives daily,
but the din drowns it out
the morning alarm sounds
she hits snooze and rolls over,
dreaming of grace
posted by Melissa at 10:19 AM
1 Comments:
i like the last notion, "dreaming of grace", quite a lot!
i don't mind it juxtaposed with the horrid sound of the snooze-buzz, but the voice of the poem seems to be defeated and that doesn't seem to be consistent with one who "dreams of grace".
the fact that the poem ends with that line is informative of the true voice of the speaker. what hope is she masking in the poem's interior that could peek out?
just a thought--i'm not sure what i am saying is even comprehendable, but it makes sense to me.
i want some bit of grace to carry over to the speaker's life--if only the remembrance of the dream.
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